I know you troops stationed overseas are excited to hear my voice address you from luxurious Mar-a-Lago where I’m ready to throw up my turkey dinner because of disgraceful judges who tell us how to protect our border. These wimps are often Californians who support sanctuary cities and liberal asylum laws that have allowed millions of illegal aliens to enter our country and hide. I’m changing all that, as you know, and have deployed thousands of your comrades along our southern border to make sure caravans of criminals don’t charge into the United States. If things get out of control, I’ll sign an executive order and close the Mexican border until order is restored. We’re already installing concertina wire like razors all over walls and fences and will soon have the border looking scarier than a prison. Happy Thanksgiving.