Elegant Quito Home of Maria Augusta Urrutia

I tell the taxi driver I’m looking for a splendid residence in downtown Quito, and he drives me into the historical center and to the home of Maria Augusta Urrutia. From outside, the house, though two tall stories, looks rather small and narrow, cramped by contiguous buildings, but upon entering I see a courtyard and…

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The Tourista Strikes in Quito

I don’t know which foods polluted, or at least agitated, my digestive tract, but I believe this misfortune began at one of Quito’s most beautiful hotels, a place graced with superb artwork and guarded by suave young men in suits. Downstairs, at a Thursday breakfast buffet before an early-morning conference about internet business opportunities, I…

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Women in Television News

In the vast and luxurious clubhouse of Seven Oaks Country Club, the League of Women Voters of Kern County hosts three female veterans of television news broadcasting in Bakersfield. Prior to their appearance the audience is treated to cashews and cake and a political history lesson: eleven states allowed women’s suffrage before the Nineteenth Amendment…

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Vladimir Putin Suppresses Pussy Riot

My Gods are no longer Lenin and Stalin and beautiful communist colossus crumbling during greatest geopolitical disaster of Twentieth Century. Higher power now is Russian Orthodox Church which supports me and ongoing recovery of nation I have rebuilt and led for many years and, God willing, will lead many more. It has thus been sacred…

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Pico y Placa in Quito

“I can’t drive tomorrow,” said an independent taxi driver in Quito, Ecuador. “Why not?” I asked. “Pico y placa.” “What’s that?” “Traffic control.” “Traffic’s pretty bad.” “Without pico y placa, it would be much worse.” “What’s the program?” “One day a week most people can’t drive. Public taxi drivers are an exception. It’s based on…

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Winton, Not Winston, in Quito

A travel newsletter I subscribed to occasionally offered stories by a guy named Winton Churchill. Oh, a wise guy, I concluded. Despite groaning about his humor, and perhaps his stability, I did conclude Churchill knew plenty about computers. He’d worked for Apple, knew Steve Jobs, toiled for other Silicon Valley concerns, some of which flamed…

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Bag in Stall

In a crowded holiday airport he long waited for a stall and was thanking god when, fast as he blinked, a hand reached under the door and yanked his bag.

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The Usain Bolt Gear

Tyson Gay has beaten me in a hundred-meter dash, so has Asafa Powell, and Yohan Blake recently outran me in both the hundred and two hundred at our Olympic trials in Jamaica. Those three are the swiftest in history, after me, and may be thinking, or at least hoping, that while I used to be…

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