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Category Archives: Wladimir Klitschko

Ali Drinks Klitschko Kool-Aid

I was the greatest and will be again. Don’t deny I can do it. I’m drinking Klitschko Kool-Aid secretly provided by Wladimir’s diabolical team of scientists who will only let me partake until I’m at my former peak, and no higher. That would be in 1967 when I was the prettiest and fastest heavyweight who […]

Also posted in Boxing, Dementia Pugilistica, Muhammad Ali

Mayor Klitschko’s Successes

I didn’t worry about ragged furniture in my office at Kiev City Hall. The city looked much worse as unemployment rose, wages fell, our till stood empty, protestors lived in tents a hundred meters from my office, and Russian troops mobilized on our eastern border. The big bears intended to convince all Ukrainians, and especially […]

Also posted in Bermane Stiverne, Boxing, Kiev, Mixed Martial Arts, Ronda Rousey, Russia, Ukraine, Vitali Klitschko, Vladimir Putin

Jack Dempsey Returns

I was simultaneously flabbergasted and thrilled the recent morning Jack Dempsey, age twenty-four and just a week after tomahawking slow, long-inactive, and overconfident giant Jess Willard, marched into my gym and said, “I’m taking my career to the twenty-first century. You interested?” Only pride prevented me from dropping to my knees and thanking all deities. […]

Also posted in Anderson Silva, Boxing, Dana White, Jack Dempsey, Jess Willard, Jon Jones, Mixed Martial Arts, New Orleans, Steve Ballmer

Klitschko and Putin Battle over Airliner

“This is Mayor Vitali Klitschko of Kiev, calling for President Vladimir Putin,” I said. “Just a minute, sir.” One minute had become fifteen when the receptionist returned and said, “President Putin is in meetings and will not be able to take your call.” “Tomorrow, then.” “Sorry, no.” I hung up and arranged for a private […]

Also posted in Boxing, Malaysia, Planes, Russia, Ukraine, Vitali Klitschko, Vladamir Putin

Return of The King

I’m back and know you’ve missed me as much as I’ve missed having you listen to me. I may be the world’s most splendid talker. In public I spellbind, in groups I entertain, and one on one I scare hell out of people. There’s nothing bad in that. That’s life, and a damn good one. […]

Also posted in Bermane Stiverne, Boxing, Dementia Pugilistica, Don King, George Foreman, Larry Holmes, Muhammad Ali, Tim Witherspoon

Ali Drinks Klitschko Kool-Aid

I was the greatest and will be again. Don’t deny I can do it. I’m drinking Klitschko Kool-Aid secretly provided by Wladimir’s diabolical team of scientists who will only let me partake until I’m at my former peak, and no higher. That would be in 1967 when I was the prettiest and fastest heavyweight who […]

Also posted in Boxing, Dementia Pugilistica, George Foreman, Joe Frazier, Ken Norton, Muhammad Ali, Sonny Liston

Rocky Rebuts

This story is part of the collection “Death in the Ring”

Also posted in Boxing, Jack Dempsey, Joe Louis, Lennox Lewis, Muhammad Ali, Rocky Marciano, Sonny Liston, Vitali Klitschko

Visiting Sonny Liston

This story is part of the collection “Death in the Ring”

Also posted in Boxing, Jack Dempsey, Muhammad Ali, Rocky Marciano, Sonny Liston, Vitali Klitschko

Vitali Klitschko Thinks

This story is part of the collection “Death in the Ring”

Also posted in Jack Dempsey, Joe Frazier, Joe Louis, Muhammad Ali, Rocky Marciano, Vitali Klitschko

Gene Tunney Returns

I see Jack Dempsey thinks Shakespeare and I have been hobnobbing in literary heaven. Actually, the truth is rather more mundane. I’ve been competing against experienced thespians, outperforming the louts, and am scheduled to debut as Hamlet, but restrictive political and economic circumstances as well as dreadful sanitation in early 17th century England have compelled […]

Also posted in Boxing, Gene Tunney, George Foreman, Jack Dempsey, Larry Holmes, Mike Tyson, Muhammad Ali, Vitali Klitschko

Klitschko Versus the Legends

This story is part of the collection “Death in the Ring”

Also posted in Boxing, Jack Dempsey, Muhammad Ali, Rocky Marciano, Vitali Klitschko

Marciano Dines at Dempsey’s

This story is part of the collection “Death in the Ring”

Also posted in Boxing, Evander Holyfield, Gene Tunney, George Bernard Shaw, Jack Dempsey, Mike Tyson, Muhammad Ali, Rocky Marciano, Vitali Klitschko, William Shakespeare

Heavyweight Champions Respond

This story is part of the collection “Death in the Ring”

Also posted in Boxing, Gene Tunney, George Foreman, Jack Dempsey, Jack Johnson, Joe Frazier, Joe Louis, Muhammad Ali, Rocky Marciano, Vitali Klitschko

Memories of Emanuel Steward

The email from a friend dropped in my box and simply said: “RIP Emanuel Steward.” I thought this is a mistake, it must be, Steward always looks handsome and healthy on TV, he’s a winner, he’ll live a long time, it must be another guy with the same name who, quickly and privately, withered at […]

Also posted in Boxing, Emanuel Steward, Lennox Lewis, Mixed Martial Arts, Muhammad Ali, Ray Leonard, Roberto Duran, Thomas Hearns