Religion

Drought is God’s Punishment

June 15, 2015

Until last week I thought the drought that’s squeezing California resulted from natural weather fluctuations, and didn’t want to be political or presume to have scientific insight so rarely mentioned climate change and then only as a relatively minor factor. I should’ve known there was a much simpler yet more ominous explanation, and Shannon Grove…

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Eldridge Cleaver has Changed

December 9, 2014

There were confrontational people in the crowd and they hurled invectives at a speaker created for confrontation. A young curly-haired fellow, smirking, waved a sign that projected insulting remarks about the man on the platform, and he shouted, “You’re in the FBI.” “First of all, you can take that sign and shove it,” said the…

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Good Luck Nigeria

June 10, 2014

I’m in the Nigerian army a few years ago when Muslim insurgents of Boko Haram start killing people in the north and demand girls stop attending Western schools and establish harsh rules supposedly found in the Koran. I don’t know or care about that stuff and doubt President Goodluck Jonathan does, either. Like me, he’s…

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Boko Haram

May 12, 2014

studious girls nailed by boko haram

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Just Askin’

May 12, 2014

why half million nigerian soldiers dance with zealots

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Godane Wants You

October 31, 2013

Bin Laden considered me extreme and sneered when I wrote, “At your service, Osama.” Good riddance. Al Qaeda’s irrelevant. Come and join Shabaab. I shall liberate all Muslims. As a prerequisite I’ve eliminated many former allies who were soft and didn’t understand we must ceaselessly destroy invading Kenyans and Somali traitors and foreign teachers and…

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Morsi the Great

June 29, 2013

I detest people who doubt I’m ideal President of Egypt. I oppose tyranny and always did in years as activist in Muslim Brotherhood. Now I’m battling reactionary elements of former regime trying to regain power and repress liberty. I don’t allow courts to help enemies of progress. I ignore them and godless parties seeking to…

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Priest

May 2, 2013

Priest short and gray has high voice but strong shake.

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Sunday School

February 13, 2013

Lady teaching Sunday school passes out coloring books and crayons and says draw pretty pictures. All kids comply but one scratches black lines over faces and bodies, forcing concerned lady to gently remove and wad.

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Vladimir Putin Suppresses Pussy Riot

August 18, 2012

My Gods are no longer Lenin and Stalin and beautiful communist colossus crumbling during greatest geopolitical disaster of Twentieth Century. Higher power now is Russian Orthodox Church which supports me and ongoing recovery of nation I have rebuilt and led for many years and, God willing, will lead many more. It has thus been sacred…

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Good News for Jesus at the Bakersfield Islamic Conference

May 14, 2012

At the sixth annual Bakersfield Islamic Conference, before a few hundred attendees in a hotel ballroom, crew-cut Joshua Evans, looking scholarly behind a long brown beard and matching brown glasses, delivered this information: you cannot be a Muslim unless you believe in Jesus, one of five great Prophets who brought about seminal changes. Islam also…

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Norwegian Fascist Salute

April 17, 2012

norwegian anti muslim anders breivik sieg heils in court to commemorate blowing up eight and shooting several dozen kids next time anders breivik sieg heils court orders fascist arm amputated and used as club

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Bible Bombers

March 15, 2012

god and allah love bombers

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Memo to U.S. Troops in Afghanistan

February 25, 2012

do not burn the koran intentionally or unintentionally and do not use it for target practice

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Madonna Teases Super Bowl Audience

February 7, 2012

hey some guy flipped off america during super bowl halftime show few noticed nonevent but bible busters protested when should’ve imagined madonna fifties fit in parked or moving cars on sofas in reading chairs on or under dining room tables planning to disappear in smoke revealing message world peace

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Trust Newt Gingrich

January 22, 2012

trust newt gingrich god and south carolina have forgiven him

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Christmas Food

December 25, 2011

thirty years merry company christmas parties no one damaged evident act of god no longer assured worries new boss banning festivities since every year food sickens millions hospitalizes thousands kills hundreds

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Taco Delight – Part 2

November 12, 2011

at party after son’s baptism host offered me taco i bit and chewed thinking this is worst i’ve ever had but maybe mistaken since tacos always good tried another bite and gagged before parting tortilla to see not ground beef but something like guts oozing white what’s this stuff cow brains host said you shoulda…

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Sunday School

November 5, 2011

lady in sunday school passes out color books and crayons saying draw some pretty pictures all kids comply but one who scratches black lines over faces and bodies forcing concerned lady to gently remove and wad

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Male Hijab

October 12, 2011

some men hide from each other in hijabs

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