Category Archives: Sarah Palin

Basketball at Caltech

You’re the basketball coach at Caltech and your most formidable opponents are not opposing players but the scientific and mathematical pedigree of a school that’s generated more than 30 Nobel Prize winners and accepts only students who project to play NBA ball in the classroom. Successful applicants generally score 700 points or more on each […]

Also posted in Alaska, Basketball, Caltech, Conservatives, Education, Facebook, Google, Mathematics, Nobel Prize, Pasadena, Republicans, Science

Obama on Edge – Just Released

Barack Obama offers incisive comments about politics, international relations, the media, drinking and drug taking. John McCain, Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh and other adversaries respond. To read an excerpt, please click here.

Also posted in Afghanistan, Barack Obama, Campaign 2012, John McCain, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Martin Luther King, Mitt Romney, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Uncategorized

Barack and Michelle Obama Audio Soars on Internet

My outlook must be unaligned with that of the masses for I here certify most television programs and commercials are insipid and only morons watch reality shows, which I’ve done but once, when compelled to write about the domestic activities of presidential aspirant Sarah Palin. On a recent night, while watching the muscular students of […]

Also posted in Barack Obama, Campaign 2012, Football, Marriage, Mitt Romney, Sex, Theater

Alarmed by “2016 Obama’s America”

I’m one knowledgeable conservative, having lived all my life in Bakersfield and spent hours a day listening to Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, and other great political analysts, and all my friends in the oilfields think like I do, and we understand Barack Obama is the most dangerous man in American history. But, I gotta tell […]

Also posted in Africa, Argentina, Barack Obama, Campaign 2012, Communism, Conservatives, Dinesh D'Souza, Economics, Europe, Jeremiah Wright, Kenya, Malaysia, Middle East, Movies, Nuclear Weapons, Palestine, Republicans, Ronald Reagan, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Singapore, Socialism, South Africa

Sarah Palin Swings

better you ain’t runnin’ cuz you need full time luvin’

Also posted in Alaska, Campaign 2012, Poetry - GTC, Sex

Sarah Palin Gazes at 2012

Listen, some people have been saying I’m jealous of Michele Bachmann since she’s been getting all the publicity and won some straw poll in Iowa. That’s silly. I could’ve won that but didn’t want to sweat for something nobody cares about. That’s why I quit as Governor of Alaska. I was bored as well as […]

Also posted in Alaska, Barack Obama, Ben Bernanke, Campaign 2012, John McCain, Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney, Rick Perry, Texas

Sarah Palin Shoots Back

Hey, I don’t like people saying I’m somehow responsible for the shooting of liberal congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords and a bunch of other Democrats last week in Tucson, Arizona just because last year online I’d put her district and nineteen others in the crosshairs of an electoral rifle. That’s blood libel since, first of all, those […]

Also posted in Arizona, Barack Obama, Gabrielle Giffords, Guns, Jared Loughner, Media, Mental Health, Murder, Radio, Rush Limbaugh, Television, Tucson

Letter to my Cable Company

Dear Cable Company, Please excuse me for annually asking you to send a technician to upgrade my service from a “limited-basic” menu of twenty-one channels to the still-merely-“basic” package of seventy-five, and then a few months later recalling your cable guy, always a different one, to climb the telephone pole in my back yard and […]

Also posted in Advertisements, Alaska, Basketball, Blake Griffin, Commercials, George Thomas Clark, Glenn Beck, Internet, Jerry Springer, Media, Television

Obama and Palin Hang in Effigy

Bigots.com is alive with exciting posts. In September Obama was hung in effigy at George Fox University, a Christian school in Oregon, and strung up this month by a critter named Mike Lunsford in his front yard in Ohio. Now Chad Michael Morisette has hung a mannequin, coiffed and red-dressed like Sarah Palin, in front […]

Also posted in Barack Obama, Campaign 2008, Homosexuals, Racism

Colin Powell Endorses Obama

I was a general and served as Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, my country’s highest ranking military officer. During the Gulf War in 1991 I was the man most trusted by Americans and indeed people from many nations around the world. They responded to my integrity and strength. I’m not bragging, just remembering […]

Also posted in Barack Obama, Bill Ayers, Campaign 2008, Colin Powell, John McCain, Media, Republicans, Rush Limbaugh, United Nations

Joe Six Pack and Hockey Mom

Driven by intense Republican pursuit of votes from Joe Six Packs and Hockey Moms, I resolved to talk to one of each in the conservative stronghold of Bakersfield, a barren and oil-derrick-marred community which also offers some groomed green neighborhoods most Californians never see from Highway 99 as they zoom through the Central Valley, looking […]

Also posted in Barack Obama, Campaign 2008, George Thomas Clark, Joe Biden, John McCain

John McCain Embarrassed

I swear I wasn’t trying to foment hatred and violence. I’m the son and grandson of admirals. As a patriot and a gentleman, I thought my followers would be motivated but respectful. I was certainly justified in trying to worry them about the character and judgment of Barack Obama. He was, and perhaps still is, […]

Also posted in Barack Obama, Bill Ayers, Campaign 2008, John McCain

Palin at her Rallies

Forget those television interviews with the mainstream media and don’t think too much about my index-card debate with Joe Biden or even my sassy acceptance speech. None of that conveys who I really am. To experience that, you’ve gotta attend one of my speeches. Lots of folks are calling them rallies. Not like those Nuremberg […]

Also posted in Barack Obama, Campaign 2008, Nuremberg

Sarah Palin’s Biography in 2064

In honor of Sarah Palin, who would have been one-hundred years old this year, Shotgun Books is releasing Palin: Maverick, Stateswoman, and Mom.  The first chapter follows: Not since the evening Richard Nixon resigned more than three decades earlier had Republicans so dreaded a night as October second, 2008.  Even Democrats reached with trepidation for […]

Also posted in Alaska, Barack Obama, Campaign 2008, Joe Biden, John McCain

Palin Reveals Democratic Treachery

I hope you knew, and I’m sure you did. It’s hard to hoodwink the American people. From the start you suspected that wasn’t really me doing those awful TV interviews. You know I’m really poised and well-spoken Sarah Palin, most popular governor in these United States. I couldn’t have been confused and overwhelmed by basic […]

Also posted in Alaska, Barack Obama, Campaign 2008, International Relations, John McCain

Sarah Palin Live and Unscripted

Don’t tell me John McCain and the Republicans think I’m so unsteady they’ll keep me hidden or attached to McCain’s hip till election day. I’ve already made my national interview debut, with Charles Gibson of ABC News, and proved myself a political prodigy with nice teeth and cheekbones and slender feminine hands and plenty of […]

Also posted in Alaska, Campaign 2008

Obama Embraces Palin

(An agitated and still unnamed aide to Senator Barack Obama was arrested by FBI agents this afternoon and charged with forging a speech by the Democratic Presidential nominee and briefly posting it on the candidate’s website. Shortly before his arrest the aide had also email blasted the following text.) “My fellow Americans, I must today […]

Also posted in Barack Obama, Campaign 2008, Joe Biden