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Category Archives: Kevin Durant

LeBron Speaks Up

I really hesitate to step forward. I’m not the meddler many say. I simply lobby for what’s best for my team. I complimented Luke Walton for good coaching late this season. I tried to protect him. Ignore those who say I’d already ordered my lieutenants to undercut him. Magic Johnson wanted him out anyway. Luke […]

Also posted in Brandon Ingram, Cleveland, Jeanie Buss, Kawhi Leonard, Klay Thompson, Lebron James, Lonzo Ball, Los Angeles Lakers, Luke Walton

LeBron James Assesses the Lakers

(Correspondent LeBron James files the first Lakers dispatch of the 2018-2019 season.) Talk to analytical scientists all you want. I’ll instead offer meat and potatoes to clarify why I’m concerned about my Lakers after the first two games this season. We hit a higher field goal percentage and modestly more baskets than either the Portland […]

Also posted in Basketball, Brandon Ingram, Karl-Anthony Towns, Kawhi Leonard, Klay Thompson, Kyle Kuzma, Lebron James, Lonzo Ball, Los Angeles Lakers

LeBron’s European Vacation

Despite trying to relax in and around a coastal castle magically backed by snowy Alpine peaks, LeBron James is tense during his European vacation. Every time he surfs he falls right off and is swallowed by massive waves. Efforts to hang glide invariably snap the cord connected to the speedboat and LeBron’s again deposited in […]

Also posted in Anthony Davis, Basketball, Basketball and Football, Kawhi Leonard, Klay Thompson, Lebron James, Los Angeles Lakers, Magic Johnson

LeBron Updates Free Agency

Please ignore reports I screamed like an unanesthetized dental patient upon learning that stellar forward Paul George, presumed to be bound for the glorious Los Angeles Lakers, instead signed to stay a few years on the arid plain of Oklahoma City. I confess I did shout in pain but the source was physical rather than […]

Also posted in Basketball, Basketball and Football, Brandon Ingram, Cleveland, Julius Randle, Kawhi Leonard, Kyle Kuzma, Lebron James, Lonzo Ball, Los Angeles Lakers, Paul George, Philadelphia

LeBron and Gilbert at the Summit

About four o’clock this dark morning five armored SUVs enter an Akron estate, a man in the first vehicle using an electronic device to open the wrought iron gate, and speed to the entrance of a mansion boasting more than thirty thousand square feet. At least ten camouflaged commandos emerge from somewhere and aim automatic […]

Also posted in Basketball, Basketball and Football, Chris Paul, Dan Gilbert, Golden State Warriors, James Harden, Kyrie Irving, Lebron James

LeBron Hires Hypnotist

Siefried, the world’s preeminent hypnotist, proudly steps into the Cavaliers locker room after game three and says, “Where is LeBron? I’ve come to accept his congratulations.” “I’m right here, you charlatan,” says the star, stepping close and looking down. “I beg your pardon. Can you not count?” “I count fine. We just lost by eight […]

Also posted in Basketball, Cleveland, Draymond Green, Golden State Warriors, Kevin Love, Lebron James, Stephen Curry, Tyronn Lue

LeBron Declares: Referees Robbed Us

Following game one of the NBA finals, it’s unfortunate fans can’t celebrate my masterful fifty-one points to lead the Cleveland Cavaliers to an upset over the formidable Golden State Warriors. Instead, we’re talking about obtuse referees who turned a great game into a farce. Late in the fourth quarter, I cleanly stripped the ball from […]

Also posted in Basketball, Basketball and Football, Cleveland, George Thomas Clark, Golden State Warriors, Lebron James, Stephen Curry

LeBron Previews NBA Finals

I’m thankful to be drowsy en route to dreamland where I can forget my body’s thirty-three-years old and tired from playing more minutes than anyone in the league and twice carrying us to playoff victories in game seven, and that almost everyone’s saying the Warriors are too good no matter what LeBron does, they’ve got […]

Also posted in Basketball, Basketball and Football, Boston Celtics, Cleveland, Dennis Rodman, George Thomas Clark, Golden State Warriors, Jose Abeto Zaide, Klay Thompson, Lebron James, Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippin, Stephen Curry

LeBron’s Championship Dreams

Am I dreaming? I hope so and we aren’t really getting bushwhacked by Oklahoma City and surrendering forty-three points in the first quarter to trail by nineteen. Despite shooting well we’re down sixteen at halftime and twenty after three quarters and let the gathering Thunder hit fifty-eight percent while they hang a hundred forty-eight on […]

Also posted in Basketball, Basketball and Football, Bill Russell, Dan Gilbert, Donald Sterling, George Thomas Clark, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, Kyrie Irving, Lebron James, Magic Johnson, Stephen Curry

“Basketball and Football” is Published

In a rousing trip through the worlds of Basketball and Football, George Thomas Clark explores the professional basketball league in Mexico, the Herculean talents of Wilt Chamberlain, the difficulties and humor of attempting to play basketball in middle age, and observes that coaching at Caltech can be more painful than studying all night for a […]

Also posted in Basketball, Basketball and Football, Bill Walsh, Donald Rogers, Football, George Thomas Clark, John Wooden, Kobe Bryant, Kristaps Porzingis, Kyrie Irving, Lebron James, O.J. Simpson, Stephen Curry, Wilt Chamberlain

How to Win Next Year

This story is in the collection “Basketball and Football”

Also posted in Basketball, Bill O'Reilly, Draymond Green, John Havlicek, Klay Thompson, Kyrie Irving, Lebron James, Red Auerbach, Sam Jones, Stephen Curry

Mr. Clutch

This story is in the collection “Basketball and Football”

Also posted in Basketball, Bill Russell, Jerry West, Kyrie Irving, Lebron James, Wilt Chamberlain

The Warrior

This story is in the collection “Basketball and Football”

Also posted in Basketball, Dan Gilbert, Draymond Green, Karl-Anthony Towns, Klay Thompson, Lebron James, Paul George, Stephen Curry

Diabolical Game Two

This story is in the collection “Basketball and Football”

Also posted in Basketball, Dan Gilbert, Draymond Green, Klay Thompson, Lebron James, Stephen Curry, Titanic, Tyronn Lue

Ominous Game One

This story is in the collection “Basketball and Football”

Also posted in Basketball, Cleveland, Dan Gilbert, Golden State Warriors, Karl-Anthony Towns, Klay Thompson, Lebron James

The Underdog

This story is in the collection “Basketball and Football”

Also posted in Basketball, Bill Russell, Cleveland, Dan Gilbert, Jerry West, Kyrie Irving, Lebron James, Oakland, Stephen Curry, Wilt Chamberlain

Alcohol v. Pot

I was a happy tourist at the pinnacle of Washington’s Monument when I became woozy and awakened an indeterminate time later in a dungeon. God, kidnapped by terrorists, I thought but reconsidered when several white males, attired in green surgical gowns, marched in and one said, “Experimentation will begin when the chief returns.” “Who’s he […]

Also posted in Alcohol, Barack Obama, Basketball, Drugs, Lebron James, Marijuana